Sunday, August 27, 2006

Mom knows best

As I mentioned already in a couple of posts, Jason is having another shortstory contest. The object was to create a piece based on the above picture in only 250 words or less. There have already been enough submissions to make this contest a roaring success, but you still have a couple of days to join and make it even better. Either way, be sure to head over there to read some or all of them. I am headed there to read some more of them myself in fact between working on my post for this week's Sunday scribblings prompt. They really are quite good. A few of my favorites so far are from Flood, Rebecca, Jeff, and Fringes to name a few. Meanwhile, here is my submission.

Mom knows best

It’s over, it’s finally over.

Mothers are always right.

“You wouldn’t like it if someone did that to you!” She would always say.

I stood outside stunned at the contrasting scene before me. The sky was filled with beautiful clouds and the moon appeared on the verge of peaking through. I found it very hard to reconcile that sky with the destruction I was seeing. Tree limbs, roofing shingles, garbage cans, and even a large picnic table were scattered everywhere in our yard. I wondered who it belonged to and if they would ever have another picnic. A huge oak tree lay sprawled across the road stopping less than ten feet from our front door.

I recalled how scared I had been when the wind was at its worst. The trailer shook so violently, I thought the whole thing would be lifted up and carried away. It was as if a giant were outside and this time I was the hamster. Our trailer, my cage. I prayed for his mother to come along and stop him. Hearing the loud crash outside even mom had lost her cool for a second.

“We’re going to die” she’d muttered.

Recalling those words now, chilled me to the bone. I looked skyward, and promised to never shake my hamster’s cage again.

It’s over, it’s finally over.

“Get your ass back in here!” dragged me from my thoughts.

“What is it mom?”

“This is just the eye!”

Mothers (gulp), always right.



Jeff said...

Well done, BD. Great description! :)

christine said...

Ditto to what Jeff said. I'll say it again, I loved it! :)

alyndabear said...

I loved this!

Flood said...

BD, how come I can't find this in the list at tCoN?

briliantdonkey said...

You probably aren't used to my initials or name that it is under over there Flood. It's #58 if I am not mistaken. That dang Jason, even his acronym sounds cool,,,,,TCON!


fringes said...

BD, I'm honored to be among your favorites. Thanks for the shout out! I'm glad your mini-bio mentioned your blog name. I'd been reading all the stories written by a Robert for a week looking for yours.

Good luck in the contest and thanks for hanging out on my blog.

Writing Blind said...

Rob, your story was great. And I already said it over there but I'll say it here too. Yes, mothers do know best. But then again, all we women do. :)

Jaye Wells said...

Rob I really liked yours, even though I was sad by the implication of it.