Thursday, May 10, 2007

So you want mundane?

Mist, over at Must get hobby , you know who I mean? The incredibly funny hottie with 4 billion shoes(and that is just the left ones btw) is hosting The carnival of the mundane this week. As such she has asked me to participate. To say I was honored would be an understatement.

That's right "WAS".

And,,,,,,,THEN I looked up "mundane" at dictionary.com.

Mundane: 2) common; ordinary; banal; unimaginative.

Awwwww Mist, you always know JUST what to say to tug at my heart strings and make me go all teary eyed. Anywhooo, on with the show.

What the hell is it with memories? More specifically with a person's memory? It is such a wierd thing how the human brain(or at least the space where a brain is SUPPOSED to be in some of our cases) works. I mean how is it that I can clearly remember the extremely ugly shirt I wore to school for my 5th grade picture day and yet, I have NO idea what the hell I just walked into the kitchen for 6 seconds ago. Once you get to the kitchen and realize you have forgotten what you came in there for what now? You can stand there for 25 minutes racking your brain on it and come up empty. Yes yes, I AM presuming that you either A) do the same thing or B) will humor me and say you do.

OR

You can walk BACK into the room you were originally in and POOF the memory comes right back. Why IS that? This should either NOT work or it should work for ALL things. Walk by a room where you once had sex BOOM you should have an instant memory so powerful it triggers an orgasm! Or at the very least a sudden urge to smoke a cigarette and or fall asleep. Sure you would have to carry an extra pair of shorts all the time but still, Fair is fair damnit!


Jokes: Why is it I can remember in excruciatingly boring detail my co-worker's story of her visit to the hair salon which happened 4 years ago? Yet let someone tell me the funniest joke ever and I have NO shot of remembering it when needed. Three days later someone asks "so you know any good jokes?" and what do you know I come up empty. The best I can do is "white horse fell into a mud puddle" or "did you hear about the dumbass that went into the kitchen and forgot what he was going in there for?"


Talking: Have you ever been talking to someone and forgotten what the hell you were about to say? THIS is bad.
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Eventually I have to give up and ask ummmm "what was I talking about"? THIS is worse.

To which the inevitible response is along the lines of "I have no idea" . Doesn't ANYONE listen to me????? Hello??? is this thing on???

Anyone, anyone? Beuller,,,,,,beuller?

And yet, when you WANT to forget about something? Fuhhhhgedaboudit! Ever get a stupid song caught in your head. The smurfs theme song? "Wheels on the bus go round and round?" Ever catch yourself singing that song for 3 days at a time? You can try to sing something else. You can watch tv, go for a jog, or any other attempted remedy but you are shit out of luck right? There is ONLY one way to cure this. You must for some reason 'pass the song onto someone else" like a common cold. And you can't cheat either. You can't simply walk up to Fred in accounting and suggest he start singing the smurf song. You instead have to walk by fred, subtly humming the smurf song and cause HIM to subcounciously think about it till he is singing it. Those are the rules! I don't know why? I just know it is so. And by the way to all my fellow workers who kept looking at me funny the other day,

In fact, I DO feel pretty.

I DO feel witty.

I DO feel pretty, and witty, AND BRIGHT!

For more mundane thoughts be sure to click on the links at the beginning of this post.

BD

15 comments:

Michael Thomas said...

The itsy bitsy spider crawled up the garden spout.............

Jenny! said...

You are hilarious! I always get the song, by I don't know who, that goes like "You and me baby ain't nothin but mammals so lets do it like they do on the Discovery Channel" I hate that song, b/c it isn't like singing It's A Small World out loud, it's kind of raunchy to sing at work. The memory thing is pretty fascinating, cuz it just doesn't make sense! You did make me say, "yeah" to myself alot during that post!

mist1 said...

Thanks for playing BD. And, I simply adore the mundane. Not in the same way that I adore shoes or men or vodka or curly hair or my cat or my inappropriate for children jeans; more like the way that I love floss and how my flip flops sound like my feet are getting tiny spankings and a whole bunch of other stuff that I forgot.

Damn, what was a talking about?

I'll link to this tomorrow.

Grad School Reject said...

Whenever I forget why I went into the kitchen I always grab a beer. I figure that there is a 93% chance that a beer is what I wanted, and there is a 100% chance that even if I didn't "want" said beer, I will be happy with my decision.

heather said...

how genius gsr! all of bd's 'why am i in the kitchen' problems solved. other than right before work, first thing in the morning and while his aa sponsor is there. ;-)

Chris said...

Damn.....I was going to comment about something but I forgot what I was going to say.....

Just telling it like it is said...

I love to read mist1 too...she always crackes me up..as well as you do also..ummm I think you are thinking way to much...then maybe when you forgot what you were doing you wont mind cause you wont think about it...how about that..
I hardly ever think...uses up way too much sugar..and I am usually on a liquid diet of wine...so I need all the calories for other things..!!(wink wink)

Beth said...

Congratulations on being picked, BD ... and yes, I do have short term memory loss. This is why I make lists ... and lists of my lists. =)

Susan said...

Ok, it's been a few days and no posts. Where are you hiding, sugar pants?

alyndabear said...

The jokes thing pisses me right off. I can never, never remember a good joke when the need arises. What's up with that?

And I think the Smurfs theme is better going round and round your head than the Inspector Gadget one.

briliantdonkey said...

Michael: good one, I'm not falling for it, but good one.

Jenny: I know what you mean. I used to get the song "I'm coming out" (NO idea who sings it) stuck in my head. One day a lesbian at work asked me if I was gay cause I was singing it. TOTALLY never occurred to me that was what it meant till then. Thankfully I thought quickly and just answered "no I am more of a lesbian than you are", though she wasn't very amused.

Mist: Thanks for asking me to. I guess now I am going to send you a vodka swilling curly haired cat in shoes for xmas.

GSR: Great strategy. I shall steal that idea from you. Since I am stealing fringes idea of stealing while stealing this idea of yours, does that count as a double steal?

Heather: my aa sponsor NEVER comes over before work. Thats just silly!

Chris: good! I was going to respond to the comment but forgot as well.

Just telling it: I rarely if ever admit to thinking.

Beth: I tried that, but forgot where the hell I put the list!Think I am going with GSR's suggestion.

Susan: awwwww thats touching! you missed me?! Or least that is the way I choose to take that comment. I may even turn off comments so you can't correct me.

Alynda: good to see you again. I will never get the jokes thing. And I will never NOT get quite annoyed by it.

BD

Beth said...

Just read GSR's. Hahaha! Much better than lists.

heather said...

even if kiddo doesn't miss your posts i do. (btw, sorry bout last night)

briliantdonkey said...

beth: haven't made it around to many as of yet but I am about to. Sounds like I should start with THAT one.

Heather: she does,,,,,she DOES miss em! Not sure what your apologizing for so it couldnt have been too bad. That said, SHAME on you. You shall have to make it up to me!

BD

heather said...

the tail end of the show there, afterwards i was like, crapolla, i shouldn't have brought that up. that's one ex that just doesn't need to be quoted any more. as for making it up to you..... we'll see. depends on what you have in mind. lol

but then again i just saw the wv. holy crap! i'm never gonna get this on the first shot!