Monday, November 20, 2006


Just a quick post....

I am looking forward to a good night. Monday night football makes its way to Jacksonville where the Giants come calling to face the Jaguars. It is a pretty much 'must win' game for us following two horrible losses to the damned Texans of all teams!

Daily moment of stupidity:

So there I am walking out of the store, milk in one hand, fumbling to find my keys with the other. I open the car door and out of habit reach down to my pockets.

Feel my wallet,,,,,,,check

pen? check

cell phone? hmmmmm not in the leftpocket.

not in the right pocket.....

I begin backing up the car out of the parking space and heading home.

Glance over to the passenger seat,,,,,no cell phone.

Console? No cell phone.

Finally my brain pipes in. YO dumbass! you are TALKING on your cell phone!

And people say cell phones are a distraction! pshhhhawwwww

Daily moment of stupidity(part two)

So there I am driving home from the store. Having a conversation on my newly rediscovered cell phone, and I start to laugh. It was a few weeks ago so I don't remember what the conversation was about, only that there was no reason for me to be laughing at that moment.

Her: "what?"

me: hmmmm?

Her: "what is so funny?"

Me : "nothing, you were saying?"

brain: "whatever you do do NOT admit to what you just did."

Me(in a panic): "then what do I say?"

brain: "tell her you saw some kid fall on his bike, no that would be mean and you are a horrible liar. Just stick to the 'nothing answer'

Her: "hello?

Me: "so what time do you have to go to work tomorrow?"

Brain: "ohhhhh good one!"

Her: "don't change the subject, what was so funny?"

Brain: "okay I revise my earlier statement to say you are a horrible liar and not so good at the 'subtle subject change' game either.

Me: "ummm nothing, I just did something stupidly funny"

Her: "what did you do?"

Brain: "tell her you ran a red light, tell her you stubbed your toe"

Me: "I was just looking all over my car for my cell phone, and duhhhhh I am talking on it."

Brain: "doh!"

Her: ".............."

Brain: "way to go genius! Now she thinks you are an idiot! Hell EYE think you are an idiot!"

Me: "shut up!"

Her: "what?"

Me: Did I just tell my brain to shut up? or did I just say that out loud? ughhhh this is getting bad fast.

Her: (giggling),

Me: whew! guess it was just my brain.

Brain: "Thank God!, and YOU shut up! Still though, that was a really bad idea."

Me: "I had no choice! I felt pressured!"

Brain: " you imagine yourself as a war hero able to stand up to interogation if necessary
and you crack under the mighty question of "what?""

Daily moment of stupidity(part 3)

So there I am looking for something to post about.

Me: I am pushed for time, we gotta get to the game, so what the hell I will just tell the cell phone story kay?

Brain: "................."

Me: "brain? brain you there? I am just going to tell another 3 people the cell phone story."

Brain: "............."

The cell phone story gets typed and posted.

Brain: "okay I am back from my nap what did I miss?"

Me : "not much, I handled things pretty good while you were gone."

Brain: "hmmmm what is that post titled "rambling" on your blog?"


Brain: Arrrrghhhh!!!! Shit I leave for a ten minute nap and THIS is what you do?


LaLa said...

Hee hee hee. I have come out with stupid things in my time... I just don't think before I speak... Once I was talking to our Receptionist at work who is allergic to wheat and we were discussing how it was in everything and how hard it must have been before packaging was marked with the ingredients and I said "I suppose they could eat fresh fruit and veges and damper". Damper.

Damper is a BREAD.

I was retelling this story about how stupid I had been at work drinks when another guy who had been in Germany for World Cup about a week before walked past in a long, grey winter coat, when I made the comment "Look at you, still think you are at the World Cup in Germany! All rugged up for European weather" He looked at me oddly, kept walking then stopped.
"You know it's Summer in Germany don't you?"

At least you internalise most of it, until you put it on the innernet of course!

Jeff said...

Now, where did I put my glasses?
Oh, here they are sitting right on the bridge of my nose!

christine said...

I thought this was supposed to be a 'quick post'? heehee

You're a funny, funny man!